Serial Play--entry #9: Final installment

GARY (picking up the wine bottle)
More wine?

LORI
I’m good.

ALEX
Gary, maybe you should—

GARY (pouring the rest of the bottle into his glass)
I’m fine.

ALEX (turning to Lori)
We have not had the best experience so far.

LORI
Are you thinking ours is good?

ALEX
No, that’s not what I’m saying. But at least yours didn’t get started.

LORI
What do you mean?

JENNIFER (understanding immediately)
Oh gosh! (she looks to Gary who isn’t really engaging in the conversation) Oh, I’m so sorry.

LORI
What? What are you sorry about?

JENNIFER
Lori, please. Show some respect.

LORI
I’d be happy to show whatever they need if I knew what happened. (to Alex) What happened?

(Alex looks across the table at Gary who nods but doesn’t really engage with the conversation for the duration of Alex’s next speech. He just kind of stares off into space.)

ALEX
Like I said before, Gary’s the one who really wanted to have a baby. He wanted it to be his biological child.

LORI
But I thought you said it was your sperm.

ALEX
That’s what we’re doing now.

LORI
I’m so confused.

ALEX
Gary and I spent about a year searching for a surrogate mother to carry the child. We worked through one of these agencies we found online. It was almost a joke at first. I mean we literally typed in “finding a surrogate mother” and up came like four different websites and we just clicked on the first one. We registered, went through all of the paperwork and evaluations and checks, and then started the process of reviewing potential candidates. We finally found a surrogate with my skin tone and hair color, because we wanted the baby to look like both of us somehow, and we flew out to Nevada to meet her.

JENNIFER
Nevada?

ALEX
Yeah, once you register and state your preferences, the surrogate can be anywhere. I mean think about it. None of us have to be there while the baby is developing.

JENNIFER
Got it.

ALEX
So we met her. We liked her. She had done this before for three other couples, two of them gay, and we felt like she was the right kind of match. We checked her references—

LORI
Your surrogate had references?

ALEX
Yeah. We were hiring her to carry our child, so we checked her references.

LORI
I never would have thought about it.

ALEX
Her references checked out, so we made the second appointment to fly to Nevada so Gary could provide the sperm. That was last year around this time.  We flew out on a Thursday, Gary provided the sample on Friday morning, we spent the weekend getting to know the surrogate a bit more, flew back, and a week later, we got the call that she was pregnant.

JENNIFER
First try?

ALEX
First try. Like I said, she’d done it three times before, and apparently she’s quite fertile.

LORI
I’ll say. Cheers to you Gary.

ALEX
So the pregnancy was going well. First trimester tests came back fine. We flew out to see her—

JENNIFER
What’s her name?

GARY (looks up from his glass)
Kerry

ALEX
We flew out to see Kerry, and she looked great. Flew back, things continued to be fine. We started to look for another apartment, cause we thought this one would be too small. We needed another room for the baby.  Comes time for the second trimester tests, and Gary asks that they make sure to check for Hurler Syndrome in this screening.

LORI
What’s Hurler Syndrome?

(Alex looks at Gary, who doesn’t answer.)

ALEX
Uh, it’s a rare genetic disorder. Severe. Most kids with it don’t survive past the age of 10.

JENNIFER
Dear God.

ALEX
Heart disease, hearing loss, progressive lung disease, progressive mental disability—

GARY
Alex…?

ALEX
Sorry.  Uh…suffice it to say, it’s unpleasant. For the parents, for the child.

LORI
And how did you know to test for this? I’ve never even heard of it.

ALEX
Gary had a cousin who had it. He lived to the age of 7. Gary was 15 when he died, so he saw the whole thing from birth to when little Jack died.

GARY
It was awful…

LORI
So you guys tested and the baby was positive for this, this Hurlers Syndrome? Is that what happened?

ALEX
Yes.

(There’s silence.)

JENNIFER
So what did you do?

ALEX
Well, obviously we don’t have the baby.

JENNIFER
But did she carry the baby to term?

GARY
No, Jennifer, Kerry did not carry the baby to term.

JENNIFER
Did she miscarry? Can the syndrome end in miscarriage?

(Gary and Alex look at each other.)

ALEX
She did not miscarry.

JENNIFER
Then what happened to the baby?

GARY
We terminated the pregnancy.

(Jennifer is clearly shaken by this news. She gets up from the table and moves away from the group. Lori doesn’t even notice.)

LORI
Oh my God. Oh my God, I am so sorry.  We are so sorry. Here I am talking like my life is awful, and you two had to--  My God…

ALEX
It’s alright.  How were you supposed to know?

LORI
Why didn’t you say anything about this when we met before? We talked about so many things that night. So many life and death things.

ALEX
Uh, well, Gary and I don’t really talk about it. We decided after it happened that it is a very private matter, and we agreed that it wasn’t something that we wanted to share with anyone. It’s a little different now, because we’re starting over. With my sperm. And plus you’re trying too, so it seems like the right moment to share the story.

GARY
I still want a child, but I just feel better that Alex is fathering the baby. I can’t go through that again.

ALEX
We’re trying to work with the same surrogate, so she and I are both going through tests right now to see if there’s anything else we should be aware of in terms of our genetic histories.

LORI (to Gary)
But didn’t you do that already?

GARY
I did. But Hurler Syndrome isn’t something that genetics test necessarily look for unless you request it specifically. I knew I was a carrier, so I requested it. Kerry had no idea she was carrying it.  All of her other pregnancies have been fine.  She’s carried for three other people, and she has a child of her own.

LORI (to Jennifer)
We really need to check this out.

(Jennifer does not answer.)

ALEX
There’re so many possible genetic diseases, it’s really hard to know anything for sure. We’re just so relieved that there’s a test at all.

LORI
Have we gotten all the genetic information on these three donors that we’re looking at?

JENNIFER
I don’t know.

LORI
I’ll make the call on Monday morning.

JENNIFER
I just don’t understand.

LORI
Honey, it happens. To lots of couples. It’s just good that Gary knew to ask for the test so that they didn’t—

JENNIFER
How could you terminate the pregnancy? I mean, how could you do that?

LORI
Jen, I think you should—

ALEX
What are you talking about?

JENNIFER
How you could you just terminate the pregnancy like that?

GARY
Look, Jennifer, I don’t think that’s a very fair question given what we knew—

ALEX
How could you even ask that question? Do you think we just came to some easy decision about this? Like Gary called me up and said, “Oh, our baby’s going to have massive physical and mental disabilities. Let’s just trash that one and start over.” Is that what you think we did?

JENNIFER
I didn’t say that. I just don’t understand how you simply aborted the child. Those tests are predictors, not conclusive.

LORI
If they’re not conclusive then why do them?

JENNIFER
Because they can help you prepare for the child.

ALEX
How does anyone prepare for a child with that many problems?

JENNIFER
I don’t know that, but I do know that I wouldn’t terminate the child.

LORI
How can you say that?

JENNIFER
I just know I wouldn’t do it. It’s wrong.

ALEX
Please don’t start with a holier than thou position on this now too. You really piss me off with this attitude.

JENNIFER
Is my attitude “holier than thou” because you don’t agree with it?  Is that it?

LORI
Jennifer, stop it.

JENNIFER
No, I want to know. Is that why? Because you don’t agree with my position?

GARY
I think what Alex is trying to say is that the decision was an awful one for us to make, the most difficult one I ever made, and it’s been very upsetting for all of us.

JENNIFER
What did Kerry want to do?

ALEX
Kerry was in complete agreement with the decision. It’s why we’re trying with her again. And if she wasn’t in complete agreement, she was working for us. We hired her to carry the baby.

JENNIFER
Yeah, but it was her egg, right?

GARY
Yes, which is why we included her in the decision-making process.

JENNIFER
That’s very big of you.  To include the mother of the child. 

GARY
Our contract with her made it clear that she signed away the right to the child long before the baby was even conceived.

JENNIFER
I don’t believe that’s possible. That a mother would willingly do that.

ALEX
See?  There it is again! That attitude that you’re better. Why do entitled little rich girls always have this kind of attitude?

JENNIFER
It’s pretty ironic that you’re calling me an entitled rich girl when you and your partner are the ones who just terminated a pregnancy because the child might have a genetic disorder. How is that not entitled?

GARY
JENNIFER! The fetus tested positive for the disease. Kerry was a carrier and she didn’t even know it! Two carriers can generate a positive human being, and that’s what happened. Are you really saying that she should have carried the child to term? Do you really believe that?

LORI
Jen, I think we should go.

JENNIFER
No, we’re not going anywhere. I wanted to go a long time ago, and you made me stay, so now we’re finishing this. (to Gary) Yes, she should have had the baby, positive test or not.

ALEX
That’s very easy for you to say. You have no experience with this.

JENNIFER
I don’t need any experience. I have my faith, and that’s what I use to make my decisions.

ALEX
Oh, don’t start with the God stuff with me now too. How are you even a lesbian with all of this God stuff rolling around?

JENNIFER
That’s exactly what I meant before. You call me an entitled rich girl because I don’t believe the same things you do, which is so typical of you so-called gay liberals. You all LOVE to make people think you’re open to everyone’s viewpoint and everyone’s experience. “I’m so liberal. Anything goes. Everybody has a right. Fair is fair.” Until somebody disagrees with you or believes something that has some tradition behind it, and then you dismiss us as crazy or conservative or I don’t know what. I’m sick of it.

LORI
Jen—

JENNIFER
I am. I put up with the same kind of condescending attitude from your lefty family and all your lesbian friends. I’m so tired of pretending to agree with all of you. I think you’re a bunch of hypocrites who ALSO come from privilege, but you just like to pretend that you’re oppressed and play these victim games. The real victim is that child you aborted.

GARY
I can’t believe that after we’ve opened up our house to you, invited you to our table, you’re insinuating that we aborted our child like we were killing a house fly. You have no idea how difficult that decision was for us. I carried the ultrasound pictures around in my wallet. It was my screensaver picture at work. We were in contract for a new apartment, and we’d already picked out names. For a boy. Kerry was carrying a boy. And yes, even with all that, we made the decision to terminate the pregnancy. At four months. Do you have any idea how difficult it was going to be to raise a child with that many special needs? DO YOU?

JENNIFER
All I know is that God only gives you something that He knows you can handle. That’s what my grandmother told my aunt when she found out she was having twins a month before she was due. And my aunt believed it and everyone turned out just fine.

GARY
Well, that’s great for your grandmother and your aunt and you, but I don’t believe in God, so that advice doesn’t help me with anything. I saw my cousin Jack deteriorate for seven years. He was a beautiful little baby, and then around nine months he just started changing.  His face and body started to grow differently, his development slowed way down. He never walked or even crawled. He was confined to a bed for all of those seven years. And I watched my aunt and uncle struggle every single day after they realized that his condition was permanent and would only get worse. It was awful. When he finally died, my aunt and uncle made it through one more year together and then they divorced. The marriage didn’t survive the illness either. We didn’t want that. We still don’t want that.

ALEX
And if we had to do it all over again we’d make the same decision.

JENNIFER
Unbelievable. That you have so little respect for the life of a child.

GARY
It’s really best if you go. I’ve tried my best to be polite and hospitable, and you’ve ceased to offer me the same level of respect. You talk about people being judgmental.

(Jennifer gets up, gathers her things, and goes to the door. She turns to Lori.)

JENNIFER
Lori, you heard what he said. Get your things and let’s go.

LORI
I can’t believe that the evening ended this way. And I can’t believe that I’m only now finding this out about you.

JENNIFER
What? That I believe in the sanctity of the life of a child?

LORI
That and how rigid you are about it. You’ve never said things like this before.

JENNIFER
I’ve been saying these things all along, you just don’t listen.

LORI
I would never think that you’d be that insensitive to someone else’s experience. Someone else’s pain.

JENNIFER
Insensitive to someone else’s pain. Anyone in this room besides me sensitive to the pain of that child? These two clearly weren’t and their surrogate wasn’t either. Now are you telling me that you can’t understand that too?

LORI
Knowing all that Gary knew about this disease and how it would have changed their lives to have this child, not to mention how much suffering the child would have had, you’re telling me that they should’ve still had the child?

JENNIFER
None of us has any way of knowing what that child’s life would have been like. God is the only one who knows that. Science can predict, but it’s not all knowing.

LORI
I really thought I knew you after all this time, but you’re like a stranger right now. It’s like when we walked through that door, you turned into a stranger.

JENNIFER
I’m not a stranger, Lori. Maybe you’re finally hearing me because of who we’re with. You’re listening differently. I don’t know why you’ve ignored what I had to say all this time, but you have.

LORI
Well, I’m not sure I like what I’m hearing.

JENNIFER
I haven’t liked what I’ve been hearing for a long time, but love is about more than liking what you hear.

(Lori looks at Jennifer. Jennifer turns away and opens the door and exits the apartment. Lori looks at Alex and Gary and then rushes to gather her things.  She moves towards the open apartment door and stops, turning back to the men.)

LORI
Thanks.

(Lori turns and exits the apartment, shutting the door behind her, but we don’t know where she’s going.  Is she going after Jennifer or is she going after something new. Gary and Alex are left staring at the closed door as the lights fade to black.  END OF PLAY)

Serial Play--entry #8: Fertility

JENNIFER
Well, I guess places have a right to seat people wherever they have space.

ALEX
You would have more experience with this.

JENNIFER
What do you mean?

LORI
Alex…?

ALEX
Your granddad owned a resort up in the mountains?

JENNIFER
What?

LORI (standing up, trying to change the subject)
Alex, can I get another drink please?

GARY
Your parents owned a resort up in the mountains? Which one?

JENNIFER
Not me parents, my grandparents. How did you know that?

(Alex looks at Lori who looks down at the floor.)

JENNIFER
Jesus, Lori—

LORI
I’m sorry, I—

JENNIFER
How many times have I told you--

LORI
What is the big friggin' deal?

JENNIFER
--that I don’t want people to know these things, much less complete strangers.

LORI
They’re not complete strangers.

JENNIFER
They are. Complete strangers. One drunken night at dinner doesn’t make you best friends.

LORI
We could have died!

JENNIFER
But you didn't. And I’m sorry that you think some extraordinary bonding experience happened that night but—

LORI
You weren’t there so you have no way of knowing what that night was like so shut up about it.

JENNIFER
Why should I shut up about this when you won’t shut up about my personal life?

LORI
What is the big deal?  So you’re grandparents owned some property?

ALEX
Well, a resort is a little more than “some property.”

LORI
You're not helping, Alex! I asked you not to say anything!

JENNIFER
What else have you asked him not to say anything about? (Lori does not answer.) Did you hear me?  What else?

ALEX
There’s nothing else.  It’s nothing.

JENNIFER
I don’t know you every well at all, but I can tell you’re lying. You look away just like the girls do when they try to lie at school. 

ALEX
Whatever.

JENNIFER
And the older ones say that when they try to dismiss someone they know is right. What else did she tell you?

ALEX
You wanna know what she told me, Ms. Holy Holy? 

LORI
Alex, just shut up! Both of you just shut up!

ALEX
She told me that you went to private school!  And that your grandparents paid for it! And that you come from privilege.  And that you keep secrets!

JENNIFER (to Lori)
Keep secrets?

LORI
I didn’t say that!  I said I learned some things tonight that I’d never heard before.

ALEX
Whatever.  Same thing.

LORI
Why are you being such a dick?

ALEX
Your girlfriend must bring it out in me.

GARY
Alex, that’s enough.

ALEX
She’s been acting like a prima donna since the moment she walked in here! Judging everything. Looking down her nose at all of us—

GARY
Alex!

ALEX
Oh, Gary, go drop some more food on the floor why don’t you? If you’d just fucking pay attention to what you're doing instead of flitting around here all the time like some—

JENNIFER
He made a mistake, Alex. Give him a break.

ALEX
You really surprise me. I’d expect a spoiled, rich girl to have farm less patience for such stupid mistakes around food and service.

JENNIFER
You’ve got it all wrong.

ALEX
I’m sure I don’t have it all wrong.

LORI
Leave her alone, Alex.

ALEX
Why do you keep defending her?  You’re so much more interesting, so much more fun!  Why are you even with her?  She comes in here, won’t even have a drink, sits there judging the rest of us—

LORI
We’re trying to have a baby, OK?

(Alex stops.)

GARY
What?

LORI
Jennifer's not drinking because we’re trying to have a baby and she's going to carry it. Alright?  She’s got an appointment this week for her first insemination, and she’s trying to—

GARY (going to Jennifer)
What great news! We’re trying too!

JENNIFER
You are?

GARY
We are!

JENNIFER
Wow! Such a coincidence!

GARY
Yeah!  It is!

(Jennifer tentatively hugs Gary back. It’s her first attempt at any kind of physical connection with anyone else that we’ve seen.)

ALEX
Wow. Uh, wow… I’m uh…really sorry. Jesus. (to Lori) Why didn’t you say something? 

LORI
I was trying to tell you before, but we obviously started talking about other stuff. And then they came back when you were telling me about you guys, and I didn’t have the chance.

(Alex is still stunned into near silence, and his embarrassment is very apparent. Jennifer and Lori are silent and won’t look at each other.)

GARY
So let’s sit down and have some dinner.

LORI
Gary--?

GARY
What? … It’s getting cold! We didn’t walk all the way there and back to have this  go to waste. (Moving to the table)  Jennifer, have a seat right here. Lori, you go here.  Alex will be here, and I’ll sit here.  Lemme just go open a bottle of the red wine to have with dinner.  Let’s switch over. And I’ll bring in a bottle of sparkling water?

JENNIFER
Sounds great.

(Gary exits leaving Jennifer, Lori, and Alex standing there in awkward silence. Jennifer looks at the table and then towards the kitchen, after Gary.)

JENNIFER (moving towards the table)
Where did he say he wanted me?

LORI
Jennifer?

JENNIFER (moving to the place at the table)
I think it was here.  Is this right, Alex?

ALEX
Huh?

JENNIFER
Is this where I'm supposed to sit?

LORI
What are you doing?

JENNIFER
I’m sitting down where Gary told me to sit. You should do the same.

LORI
But—

JENNIFER
Us “spoiled, rich girls” are great at dinner parties when there’s tension.  Happens all the time.

LORI
I think we should go.

JENNIFER
Our gracious hosts have gone to all of this trouble to host us for this lovely dinner party, and you’re suggesting we leave?

LORI
Don’t pull this shit now.

JENNIFER
I’m not pulling any shit. Where are your manners, for God’s sake? 

LORI
Now you’re being ridiculous.

JENNIFER
I don’t know what you’re talking about.

(Gary comes back into the room with four glasses, a bottle of red, and a bottle of Perrier. Lori shakes her head, moves to her chair, and sits down.)

GARY
Alex, are you coming?

ALEX (still a bit dazed)
What?

GARY (pointing)
Have a seat there. Start passing the food.

ALEX
Right. OK. (He follows Gary’s instructions.)

(There’s silence as Gary pours three glasses of the wine and the water for Jennifer, and Alex passes the bowls of food around the table.)

GARY (sitting at his place)
So who is your doctor?

JENNIFER
For the fertility process?

GARY
Yes, for the fertility process. I’m always curious to find out where other couples are going, what their experience is like, you know, the whole she-bang.

JENNIFER (looking at Lori who doesn’t return the look)
Uh, OK. Well, we’re going to Dr. Kramer. Her practice is on 78th and Madison. She’s the daughter of a friend of my father, and she had great ratings on our insurance website. So we met with her about two years ago and—

GARY
You’ve been trying for that long?

JENNIFER (again looking at Lori)
Uh, sort of.

GARY
What does “sort of” mean?

(Jennifer looks to Lori who is drinking her wine. She notices that Gary and Alex are also looking at her, so she puts the wine down and leans forward.)

LORI (like it's a secret)
Jennifer is now modeling what she wishes I would do for her.  Right, honey?

(Silence.)

LORI
We started our process with Dr. Kramer with the assumption that I would carry the baby, that it would be my egg, and I would be the biological mother. But that didn’t work out.

GARY
What happened?

ALEX
Gary, maybe she doesn’t want to talk about it?

GARY
Oh. Oh! Oh.  I’m sorry

LORI
No, I’m fine to talk about it. We found a donor that we liked, we made the connection, and I was inseminated. (she takes a drink of wine) Nothing happened. We tried again. Nothing happened. After five attempts, we decided that maybe it wasn’t meant to be.

JENNIFER
But Lori really wanted to have a baby. It’s less important—   Sorry. Was less important to me, but when I realized how much Lori wanted it, I figured I’d give it a try.

GARY
So great. You and Alex are so much alike. (He takes a sip of his wine and smiles.)

ALEX
Huh?

JENNIFER
How so?

GARY
Well, something similar happened to us.

ALEX
I think it’s a lot different, Gary.

GARY
How so?  It’s like fate makes the choice, right?  Fate, or nature, or—

JENNIFER
God?

GARY
OK…sure, if that’s what you believe, we can say God. But whatever force it is, so much of it is out of our control. I mean so much of human life is just not what we think it is in terms of our ability to control it. You know, we think because modern medicine is so advanced that doctors can do anything, but it’s just not the case.  They can do a lot, but they can’t do everything. They can’t save everyone. They can’t solve all of our problems.  We want to think they can, but they can’t. They have no way of knowing what’s really going to happen when they tell you those statistics about diseases or traits or characteristics.

ALEX
OK, Gary, that’s—

GARY
It’s true.  We put so much faith in these people who pay all this money for this specialized training and spend hours working long shifts to get their residency hours, and then they continue to be mentored, supposedly, and they do professional development, supposedly, and yet they still don’t always know what the fuck they’re doing!  I mean all the money they make, the fancy cars they drive, the vacations they take, and they still fuck things up.  For people. Who just simply want to have a child.

(There’s silence after this.  Gary picks up his wine glass and drains it.)

GARY (picking up the wine bottle)
More wine?

LORI
I’m good.

ALEX
Gary, maybe you should—

GARY (pouring the rest of the bottle into his glass)
I’m fine.

Serial Play--entry #7: A tisket, a tasket...

ALEX
I think you’re being way too protective.

LORI
Alex, please? You don’t have to go home with her tonight.  I do.  DO NOT say anything.

ALEX
OK, OK.  So weird. … I can’t believe it’s such a big deal.

LORI
Believe me. It’s a big deal.

ALEX
Is she like this about everything?

LORI
Not everything. But when it comes to our relationship, she keeps it quiet. Although, I've heard a couple of things here that were news to me.

ALEX
Like what?

LORI
Like her trips as a kid. Like her mom working as a bank teller.

ALEX
Her mom worked as a bank teller. What’s the big deal?

LORI
If you knew her mother…

(Lori is silent as she takes it all in.)

LORI
She never told me any of that...

ALEX
Why not?

LORI
Not totally sure. ... Between you and me--

ALEX (holds up his hand)
Girl Scouts Pledge

LORI
Thanks... Jennifer's family can be a little challenging. Her dad is an academic, but he comes from money. So Jennifer says that they struggled before her mom started working, but it was more that her dad was pretty stingy with the finances.

ALEX
Uh huh.

LORI
I mean Jen went to Dalton.

ALEX
The Dalton School here in the city?

LORI
Yeah. Super chi chi Dalton.

ALEX
And that's why she won't answer me about where she went to school.

LORI
She doesn't like to talk about it because she says people get the wrong idea.

ALEX
Well, it does conjure up certain images doesn't it? Fancy lunches?

LORI
Snotty parents?

ALEX
Teachers who really want to be college professors?

LORI
Massive tuition costs. And in her family's case, it was times two. She and her brother both went there. I mean, I think you get a break when you send more than one kid, but still.

ALEX
It's a massive amount of money.

LORI
Right. And Jen's parents couldn’t afford to send their kids there on a junior professor's salary supplemented by a bank teller's salary. Her grandparents paid for it.

ALEX
How'd they make their money?

LORI
Her grandfather made some very smart investments in real estate after World War II, and those properties just skyrocketed in value. Then he bought one of those private country clubs in the Adirondacks--

ALEX
Like in Dirty Dancing?

LORI
Just like that, except no Johnny to get Baby out of the corner.

ALEX
Dare to dream…  Have you been?

LORI
Closed now, but we've driven up there to see the property. Beautiful countryside. Totally dilapidated buildings, but the cheese factor was clear. Jen remembers visiting it as a kid, just before it closed.

ALEX
Those exclusive places are so awful.

LORI
I'm glad I only saw the aftermath.  Anyway, all that to say that Jen doesn't talk about any of it. She's shared it with me because I kinda forced her to. But she hates it when other people know.

ALEX
Yet she works in that world. I mean, it protects her in some ways, right?

LORI
All I'll say is that she's a great teacher, and she loves her job. She has me come in and talk about being a professor every year, and I spend the day. I'm amazed at what she does with her girls. I'm good for my 45-minute presentation, and after that I'm done. I'll take the college students any day of the week over the little ones.

ALEX
Definitely not something I could do.

(Alex drains his glass.)

ALEX
I'm not sure I'll be good with one, much less a roomful.

LORI
Are you guys thinking of having a kid?

ALEX
Oh, we're beyond the thinking. Actively pursuing is more accurate?

LORI
Really?  I didn't peg you as the child rearing type.

ALEX
I'll take that as a compliment, and then say that neither did I. But Gary really wants to have a baby. He's agreed to take the paternity leave, and his firm had all that in place. My architecture firm is too small to accommodate my leaving for any amount of time, so Gary knows the score. I told him if he wanted a kid, he was going to bear the brunt of it.

LORI
You don't sound so enthused.

ALEX
It's not that. I think it could be a good experience. I also think I have good DNA so I should leave it behind, and--

LORI
So it's your sperm?

ALEX
Yeah. We tried once with Gary's and--

(At this moment, the front door opens and Gary and Jennifer come in with the food. They are laughing and chatting.)

GARY (coming in with the bags)
So Alex said to him that we really needed a better room than the one they gave us, and he said--

ALEX
Jesus, not the hotel homophobe story again.

GARY
What? It's a good story.

ALEX
I'm not sure I'd call it good, and you’ve told it at every dinner party we’ve thrown since it happened.

GARY
I think it bears repeating.

ALEX
Here, gimme the bags. I don't need to hear it again.

JENNIFER
So what happened?

LORI
Now you have to start at the beginning.

GARY
Oh gosh, well not all the way back. Long story short, Alex and I take a trip to Hawaii to one of these really private resorts. It was meant to be a get away after we both finished these big projects at work. I had a major merger of two companies and Alex did the ribbon cutting on a children's museum he did in Sacramento. I met him there, and then we flew to Hawaii. When we got to the resort, we went to check in, and the host put us in this bungalow way at the back. They started to walk us there, and Alex stopped the bellboy helping us with our bags and made us go back to the desk. He proceeded to ask why weren't at the front of the resort. We had requested beach views and easy access to the water.

LORI
Ah. Here it comes.

GARY
Has this happened to you?

LORI
Maybe. Finish the story.

GARY
The guy at the desk said that it was a family resort, and that he needed to be careful about where he placed us. Given our “relationship.”

LORI
When was this?

GARY
Last year. Early March.

LORI
I thought Hawaii was supposed to be gay-friendly.

GARY
I'm just reporting our experience.

JENNIFER
So what happened?

GARY
Alex called the guy a homophobe, which he tried to deny. Alex then turned to another couple with their two young kids waiting to check in and asked if they had a problem with us being there. They were terrified. Alex basically raised a big stink until the guy moved us to the front of the resort. We got a complimentary bottle of champagne at dinner that night and an apology from the manager the next day.

JENNIFER
Wow...

LORI
Good for you guys.

JENNIFER
I don't have that kind of guts. We would have been at the back of the resort.

GARY
The reality is that Alex hates to argue about stuff like this. In fact, neither of us wants special treatment--

LORI
But that wasn't asking for special treatment. It was asking for what you requested.

GARY
Right. And they had confirmed it. So Alex made the point. I'm with you, Jennifer. We would have been in the back if he left it up to me. But Alex wasn't having it.

(Alex comes in from the kitchen carrying two bowls of food. Lori raises her empty cocktail glass.)

LORI
Excellent work there, Alex. Take down "The Man."

ALEX
Uh, God, I hate that story.

LORI
Why? It's great!

ALEX
I'm glad we got the bungalow at the front, but I hate that kind of victim game we have to play sometimes. I'm not interested in being anyone's charity case. Plus the guy I yelled at wouldn't look at us the rest of the time we were there.

GARY
And Alex thought he was cute.

ALEX
He was.

GARY
And he tried valiantly to get his attention again.

ALEX
I think anyone with that kind of discomfort is just a homo in waiting. I was trying to help.

(Alex leaves to get the next bit of food.)

GARY
His way of helping was to go to the front desk in just his speedo and ask for an extra key.

JENNIFER
Oh!

GARY
That's what they said. As you saw before, Alex has very little shame when it comes to--

LORI
With good reason.

GARY
Trust me, I'm not complaining, but when he stuffs his biz-ness into a speedo, it's a lot to handle.

LORI
No pun intended.

JENNIFER
Don't be so crass, Lori.

LORI
We're among friends, Jennifer.

JENNIFER
But still.

GARY
Not to worry, Honey. I think we’re on the same side here. But a little off color humor never hurts. Just to say, a tisket, a tasket, there’s a whole lot in his basket.

(Gary and Lori howl with laughter, and Jennifer tries to join in, but she’s not so amused.)

GARY
So has this happened to you two?

LORI
Not at a hotel like this, but it happens.

JENNIFER
What are you talking about?

LORI (ignoring Jennifer)
There was this time at an airport when they wouldn’t let us check in together because our last names were different.

GARY
How long ago was that?

LORI
It was right around our first year anniversary, so five years ago? We were flying back from a friend of mine’s wedding.

JENNIFER
We were in North Dakota.

GARY
I’m sorry.

LORI
No, it was beautiful, but gayness is not so much on the radar screen there.  We ended up just doing what they wanted us to do—

JENNIFER
Checking in for the flight separately. Not a big deal.

LORI
But it is a big deal when you want to do this trip back with the person you just attended a wedding with and have been dating for a year.

GARY
She’s got a point.

(Alex enters with the next bowls of food.)

ALEX
Let’s get to the table before it gets cold.

JENNIFER
She also thinks that we’re regularly seated at the back of any restaurant we go to because we’re lesbians.

LORI
There is a distinct pattern about where we get seated.

JENNIFER
I think it’s all in your head.

ALEX
That happens to us at this one restaurant around the corner.

GARY
They always seat us away from the door, kind of off to the side and in the back, like they don’t want patrons to see us.

LORI
I hate that.

GARY
We keep saying that we’re not going back, but then we cave because they have great cocktails.

ALEX
They’re always nice to us once we’re seated, but I’m pretty sure they want to keep the gays in the back.

LORI
Even in New York City?

ALEX
We like to think this place is one big gay-topia, but there are little plots of discomfort all over.

JENNIFER
Well, places have a right to seat people wherever they have space, right?

ALEX
You would have more experience with this, right?

JENNIFER
What do you mean?

LORI
Alex…?

ALEX
Your granddad owned a resort up in the mountains?

JENNIFER
What?

LORI (trying to change the subject)
Alex, can I get another drink please?

GARY
Your parents owned a resort up in the mountains? Which one?

JENNIFER
No, my grandparents. How did you know that?

(Alex looks at Lori who looks down at the floor.)

Serial Play--entry #6: Secret's out

GARY
Whatever you say, dear.

ALEX
Gary...?

GARY
He hates it when I say "dear".

ALEX
My grandmother who could barely see or hear towards the end would say that to my grandfather all the time. Just to shut him up.  Made him furious. Drives me crazy when I hear it.

GARY
OK, enough with the dirty laundry. They’ve already seen and heard way too much and we're barely past the finger foods.

ALEX (deep breath)
So we've got an order of saag with chicken, chicken vindaloo, tandoori chicken, and the chick pea dish I can't say. Then an order of pakora, an order of samosas, and plenty of naan. Then four orders of surprise me rice. Good?

LORI
Ours is right. (raises her glass)

GARY
Double the pakora and samosas and then we're dandy.

ALEX (marking his list)
We're set. I'll place the order.

GARY
And I'll mix you a drink.

(Gary exits to the kitchen and Alex picks up his phone to call in the order.)

ALEX (while dialing)
We’re really not this bad all the time. Long week.

LORI
It’s fine. You should hear us sometimes.

JENNIFER
Lori!

LORI
Oh, c’mon.  What’s the difference?

ALEX (on the phone)
Yeah, hi? . . . Yeah, it’s Alex. Right. . . . . Yeah, it’s been a couple of weeks. . . . We were away for work.  Yes.  Yes. Right. . . You have the number, yeah? . . . Good. Yeah, I’d like an order of the chicken saag, an order of the chicken vindaloo. . .

JENNIFER (whispering to Lori)
Just because they’re doing it doesn’t mean we have to.

LORI (taking a drink)
Whatever…

ALEX (on the phone)
No, there’s more. . . .Yeah we have some some guests.  Yeah. An order of the tandoori chicken and an order of #27. . . #27. . . Right the chick pea dish. . . Yeah, that one.  And then four orders of rice. . . . Uh, yeah two white rices and then surprise me with the other two. . . . Surprise me. . . .Like you make the choice. . . Our guests want to experiment. . . .YES. You make the choice for the other two. . . Hold on there’s more. . . . Yeah we’re hungry. . . .  So two orders of naan, two orders of the samosas, and two orders of the pakora. . . And you send sauces, right? . . . Great. . . . Oh, no, actually, we’ll pick up. . . . Yeah, I’m serious. . . .How long will it be? . . .OK. We’ll be right there. (hangs up) The benefits and deficits of being a regular. (towards the kitchen) Gary! It’s ready in 15 minutes!

GARY (returning with Jennifer’s water)
That fast?

ALEX
He said they’re not so busy for some reason.

GARY
OK, I’ll leave now.

JENNIFER
I’ll come with you.

GARY
No, it’s fine. You should stay here and relax. You’re our guest.

JENNIFER
I’d love the walk.

GARY
But your water.

JENNIFER
It’ll be here when we get back.

ALEX
He can handle it, Jennifer. It’s just a couple of bags.

LORI (with another drink)
Let her go. She needs the walk.

JENNIFER
Yeah, thanks.

GARY
OK, then. Just let me get my wallet.  (He exits to the hallway to get his wallet in their bedroom.)

LORI (to Alex)
Aren’t you gonna have another drink?

ALEX
Yeah, I was going to, but Gary never brought it in.

LORI
Huh.

ALEX
Yeah, huh.

(Gary re-enters)

ALEX
Where’s my drink?

GARY
Uh, you told me to get the food, so I didn’t mix the drink. Do you want me to do it before I leave?

ALEX
Nope. Go get the food.

GARY (towards the kitchen)
It’ll only take a minute.

ALEX
Just GO, I said. Get the food. I’m sure we’re all starving.

LORI
Ravenous!

GARY (ignoring them both, to Jennifer)
Ready?

(Jennifer nods, puts down her glass, and walks to the door.)

LORI (raising her glass)
Hurry back!

(Jennifer looks at her before leaving the apartment. Gary exits after her and shuts the door. Lori is still on the couch, and Alex is standing there.)

ALEX
Jesus.

LORI
Yeah.

ALEX
I really need a drink.

LORI
Number two is going down just fine here.

ALEX
Lemme catch up.

LORI
What are you waiting for?

(Alex heads into the kitchen, but the two continue talking.)

ALEX (offstage, sounds of cocktail shaker under conversation)
WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

LORI
WHAT?

ALEX
THAT LITTLE PISSY PARTY.

LORI
OH. THAT. (she takes a drink) THAT’S JUST JEN. I MEAN “JENNIFER.” (she takes another drink) PARDON ME. NOTHING’S EASY, RIGHT?

ALEX
TELL ME ABOUT IT. (shaking stops)

LORI
I MEAN SHE CAN BE SO UPTIGHT SOMETIMES. I’M SORRY IF SHE’S MAKING THIS A REAL BUMMER. (drains the glass) SHE’S A BIT OF A WORRIER. . . . ABOUT EVERYTHING…

(Alex re-enters with his cocktail.)

ALEX (raising his glass)
Cheers!

(Lori raises her empty glass.)

ALEX
Why didn’t you tell me you needed another?

LORI
Cause I think holding right here is a better choice. At least until there’s some more food.

ALEX (scoffs)
Uh, yeah. Sorry about this. It’s just par for the course.

LORI
Not the first time?

ALEX
Not exactly. (takes a drink) Gary’s never dropped the dinner on the floor, but there are plenty of other shitty moments like this where a night gets derailed because he does something stupid.

LORI
Like what?

ALEX
Oh, there’s the time he cooked dinner for my brother and his family and used pine nuts in the sauce. We get halfway through the dinner, and my nephew’s face is bright red and his little hands are swelling. My sister-in-law asked what was in the sauce, then proceeds to scream and run for her purse. 

LORI
Shit.

ALEX
Nut allergy.

LORI
Sure.

ALEX
Out comes the epi-pen and the cell phone, and the next thing I know NYPD and FDNY are in my apartment with a stretcher and my nephew is on oxygen and out the door.

LORI
Dinner is served.

ALEX
The only consolation was the hot firemen.

LORI
Amen!

ALEX
But they didn’t stay long.

LORI
Was your nephew ok?

ALEX
Fine after a night in the hospital.

LORI
Kids are resilient. How old?

ALEX
He was 7.  9 now.

LORI
Glad it turned out OK.

ALEX
They haven’t been back for dinner since.

LORI
Do you blame them?

ALEX
I guess not...

LORI
I wouldn’t have thought of Gary as someone who makes mistakes.

ALEX
No one does. He doesn’t make mistakes anywhere else. For some reason, they always happen here. In our house. On occasions like this.

LORI
Huh.

(There is silence as Alex takes another drink.)

ALEX
So…Is she always that way?

LORI
Jen?

ALEX
“Jennifer”

LORI
Ah yes, excuse me. “Jennifer.” Yeah, that’s pretty much her.

ALEX
I mean she's like you told us she would be, but I’m kinda surprised that’s who you’re with.

(Lori doesn’t say anything.)

ALEX
I mean . . . uh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that (takes a drink) That was really outta—

LORI
No, I understand. I know.

ALEX
Really, I didn’t mean anything by it, I just—

LORI
It’s OK, I’ve heard it before. Opposites attract, right?

ALEX
I’m not so sure I’d say you were opposites in the way that people mean when they say “opposites attract.”  It’s just that… (finishes his drink) you’re just so different is all.

LORI
Do you mean we’re different or I’m different.

ALEX
You two seem very different.

LORI
How?

ALEX
Jennifer just acts so…

LORI
Uptight?

ALEX
It’s more than that. It’s like she’s stuck or something. Or hiding?  Is that it?  Hiding?

LORI
She doesn’t like to talk about herself very much. She gets mad when I tell people things about her.

ALEX
Why?

LORI
It’s complicated.

ALEX
So our time in Boston must have made her really happy.

LORI
Yeah, well, after being together for awhile, I’ve learned not to say so much. I’m pretty good when I’m sober, but loose lips sink ships, and mine get real loose with the booze.

ALEX
So she thinks we know too much about her?

LORI
She’s upset that you know about our past.

ALEX
That she was your student?

LORI
Uh, yeah.

ALEX
What’s the big deal?

LORI
No idea.

ALEX
It happens all the time, right? You academics play by a whole different set of rules when it comes to that stuff. At least that’s what I hear.

LORI
As with many things, you hear about it with the men all the time, and we just sweep it aside as boys being boys, but women are much quieter or sneakier or something. And then when it comes up, there are all sorts of eye brows raised.

ALEX
It’s no different though.

LORI
Eh, it’s a little different. Different power dynamics.

ALEX
Still teacher-student.

LORI
But different between two women. Seems to be less taboo on the surface, but then it gets all Children’s Hour.

ALEX
Children’s Hour?

LORI
It’s a play.

ALEX
Oh. I don’t know it.

LORI
No loss.

(Silence as Alex takes this in.)

ALEX
But it still upsets her that people know?

LORI
It does. She’s very private about it.

ALEX
She’s gotta know we don’t care. (gesturing around the apartment) Judgment-free zone.

LORI
Doesn’t matter. She’s fine about a lot of stuff, but not about that.

ALEX
Well, we can just tell her that—

LORI
NO, you cannot say anything. She’ll flip and we’ll never make it through dinner.

ALEX
I think you’re being way too protective.

LORI
Alex, please? You don’t have to go home with her tonight.  I do.  DO NOT say anything.

ALEX
OK, OK.  So weird. … I can’t believe it’s such a big deal.

LORI
Believe me. It’s a big deal.

Serial Play--entry #5: Cumin Castle

JENNIFER
Gary said that I’m just like you said I’d be.  What did you tell them I’d be?

(At this moment, the vacuum goes on in the kitchen. Lori smiles, shrugs her shoulders, and kisses Jennifer again.)

JENNIFER (over the vacuuming sounds)
What did you say to them about me?

LORI (mouthing the words and smiling sheepishly)
I can’t hear you.

JENNIFER (over the vacuum sounds)
Very funny!

(The two sit in silence as the vacuum runs. Lori picks up a book from the coffee table and starts to look at it. The vacuum stops.)

LORI
This is the exhibit you wanted to see?

JENNIFER
Yeah, it was a bunch of Frank Lloyd Wright's sketches. I've been kind of obsessed with him since I was a kid.

LORI
Why?

JENNIFER
My dad was into architecture and one summer we took a road trip to see different examples of Frank Lloyd Wright. My mom was the navigator--

LORI
Your mom?

JENNIFER
I know. Doesn't seem possible now.

LORI
She acts like she can barely find her way to the grocery store.

JENNIFER
Well, this was before she stopped working. My dad wasn't department chair at this point, still a junior professor, so she had to work.

LORI
Doing what?

JENNIFER
She worked as a bank teller.

LORI
A bank teller?

JENNIFER
Yeah.

LORI
Your mom seems so…I don’t know. Not math oriented?

JENNIFER
She's actually really good at math.  And a lot tougher than she looks.

LORI
We've spents lots of time with your family--

JENNIFER
Too much probably--

LORI
--and I would never in a thousand years guess that you’re mom worked as a bank teller.

JENNIFER
Well, she did. And that summer when I was in 2nd grade and Stephen was in 4th, my parents rented a mobile home and we drove for three weeks to these different Frank Lloyd Wright buildings. Fallingwater was my favorite.

LORI
Fallingwater?

JENNIFER
It's a house that Wright built in Pennsylvania. Near Pittsburgh. Here, let me see the book.

(Jennifer takes the book from Lori, and she pages through.)

JENNIFER
Not seeing any images of Fallingwater.

LORI
I'm learning all sorts of new things about you here.

JENNIFER
What do you mean?

LORI
It's like this place brings out all your secrets or something.

JENNIFER
I wouldn't really call this a secret. It's just stuff we never talked about. I'm sure there are plenty of things about you that we've never talked about, right?

(Jennifer continues to look through the book. Lori doesn't answer.)

JENNIFER (looking up)
Right?

LORI
Sure.

(Lori smiles and finishes her drink and puts it down. Gary comes back in from the hallway in a new shirt.)

GARY (doing a little twirl)
All clean.

LORI (dove claps)
Lovely!

GARY
I better go check and see if Alex is still speaking to me.

LORI
It's much better in there now, I'm sure.

GARY
Fingers crossed!

(Gary exits into the kitchen. Jennifer puts down the book and sits down next to Lori on the couch.)

JENNIFER
So what did you tell them about me?

LORI
Why do you keep asking?

JENNIFER
Because it's weird being around people who know things about me when I know nothing about them. And I don't know what you told them about me and that makes it--

LORI
I told them you’re a teacher. I told them that you are very sweet and pretty. That we've known each other for a long time but didn't get together until 6 years ago, that you like--

JENNIFER
Why did you tell them that?

LORI
What? That you’re very sweet and pretty?

JENNIFER
Cut it out. You know what I'm talking about.

LORI
Why shouldn’t I tell them?

JENNIFER
My gosh, Lori!

LORI
What's wrong with them knowing?

JENNIFER
I just don't think it’s something that everyone needs to know.

LORI
Look, I was with Alex and Gary alone for a long time. After we realized about the accident, at the dinner we drank a lot, the next morning we had a long car ride back here. We talked about all sorts of things.

JENNIFER
But that stuff is really personal about me.

LORI
And?

JENNIFER
And I don't think you have the right to just tell total strangers about my past.

LORI
What are you so afraid of?

JENNIFER
I'm not afraid of anything.  I just don’t feel that—

(Alex and Gary re-enter from the kitchen. Gary carries a number of take out menus, and Alex takes the vacuum back over to the closet and puts it away.)

GARY
So we've got Thai Paradise, Golden Choice Chinese, Neighborhood's Best BBQ, Tip of the Boot Italian, and Cumin Castle. Any of those sound tempting?

ALEX
We've eaten at all of them.

LORI
Jennifer's vegetarian so...

JENNIFER
Whatever is fine. I'm sure I can find--

GARY
Let's eliminate the BBQ.

ALEX
And we had Chinese last night.

LORI
Jennifer cooked Italian this past week.

JENNIFER
But I--

GARY
That leaves us with Thai Paradise or Cumin Castle.

LORI
What's Cumin Castle?

GARY
Indian fusion.

LORI
Fused with what?

ALEX
It's a good question. We haven't quite figured it out yet.

GARY
All we know is that it goes great with red wine.

LORI
Is it spicy?

GARY
Uh...?

ALEX
Yes.

LORI
Jen?

JENNIFER
Anything will be fine.

LORI
Right, but spicy is--

JENNIFER
--fine with me. I'll find something.

ALEX
We can totally go with Thai.

JENNIFER
I LOVE INDIAN FOOD.

(Alex and Gary look at the women who are staring at each other a little too intently. Then they look at each other.)

ALEX
OK then. Cumin Castle it is. Do you want to look at the menu?

LORI (taking the menu)
Sure, we'll take a look.

GARY
And while you're deciding, how about I make some drinks?  Alex can choose for me. He knows what I like.

LORI
What do you usually get?

GARY
I get saag with chicken.

LORI
Is that on the menu?

GARY
It's not but they make it for me anyway.

LORI
Alex?

ALEX
Chicken vindaloo.

GARY
Who wants a drink?

LORI
I'll have another round.

ALEX
Same.

GARY
Jennifer?

JENNIFER
Some more water would be great.

GARY
I've got plenty of wine?

JENNIFER
I'm good with the water.  Thanks. Can I see the menu?

(Lori hands her the menu and Gary exits.)

ALEX
OK, let me get a piece of paper and pen to take your order. (To Lori) For the lady?

LORI
I'll have the tandoori chicken with an order of naan--

ALEX
Oh, the naan is complimentary.

LORI
Well then. Fancy.  How about an order of pakora to start?

ALEX
You got it. What kind of rice?

LORI
Whatever. Surprise me.

ALEX (writing)
One surprise rice. (To Jennifer) And for the other lady?

JENNIFER (still looking at the menu)
Uh...I think I'll have this chick pea dish. (Pointing to the menu)

ALEX
I don't know to say it, but I'll write it down.

JENNIFER
And I'll start with--

LORI
Is that the chick pea dish with the chili symbol next to it?  Should you be having--

JENNIFER
It's fine, Lori.

LORI
But you aren't--

JENNIFER (ignoring her)
And I'll have an order of the samosas to start. And make mine a surprise rice too.

ALEX
Two surprise rices. Any sauces?

LORI
They'll probably send some, right?

ALEX
I think so.

(Gary comes in with Lori's drink.)

ALEX
Do they send sauces?

GARY
Yeah, lots of them.

ALEX
What kind of rice?

GARY
Whatever it comes with.

ALEX
OK. Should I have it delivered?

GARY
Why don't I just go pick it up?  It's a block away? I dropped the dinner all over the floor. I can go pick up our food.

ALEX (to the women)
This is a first. It'll snow tomorrow.

GARY
Oh, shut up. You make out like I never do anything.

ALEX
Well, that's the first time in 11 years of being together that you've ever offered to pick up the takeout.

GARY
Whatever you say, dear.

ALEX
Gary...?

GARY
He hates it when I say "dear".

ALEX
My grandmother who could barely see or hear towards the end would say that to my grandfather all the time. Just to shut him up.  Made him furious. Drives me crazy when I hear it.

GARY
OK, enough with airing our laundry. The girls have already seen and heard way too much and we're barely past the finger foods.

ALEX (deep breath)
So we've got an order of saag with chicken, chicken vindaloo, tandoori chicken, and the chick pea dish I can't say. Then an order of pakora, an order of samosas, and plenty of naan. Then four orders of surprise me rice. Good?

GARY
Double the pakora and samosas and then we're dandy.

ALEX (marking his list)
We're set. I'll place the order.

GARY
And I'll mix you a drink.

(Gary exits to the kitchen and Alex picks up his phone to call in the order.)